Disgust

I dont even hate you. I am just utterly disgusted by your behavior.

And to think I took any shit for making the stand I did against you, and here it all comes out, I was right about you. You are a very selfish individual with no sense of the meaning of friendship, love, and especially truth.

And you my love, well now there is something I regret. How I tormented myself for the decisions I forced myself to make. How I see that all I was doing was wasting my time with such a coward.
Have fun. You two definitely deserve eachother.

06-26-06

Well I felt like blogging, though I dont really have anything interesting to talk about.

Its a monday. Work was super crazy this morning cause payroll was all outta control.
Had gym after work as usual...today I was really spent afterwards. Came home, showered, made myself get to my moms house, then basically sat like a zombie at the table trying to study for our final tomorrow night.
So... its pretty lonely at home right now. Most of my furniture is gone. No tv. No youngin. No nothing really 'cept my bed, some clothes, this computer and my bathroom stuffs. Even the cats are gone already :(
Gotta say, taking the cats to Armens was really hard. I got all their stuff ready, packed upall their toys, and went and got them a supply of food & litter....when I got home from shopping and knew the next step was getting them in the carriers, I just broke down. Total uncontrollable sissy la la crying. Can't explain to them whats going on, they'll just know that their momma took them somewhere and left.

ok then...well only 14 days left. End work this friday, my office is so great, I get a BBQ party on thursday. I really like everyone I work with, too bad I am leaving, this was a great job. Adn what else, no more apartment after Friday either. Living with my mom agian should be fabulous. Sleeping on the couch, having no privacy, trying to cope in my bro's stinky pee pee bathroom....ya fabulous! Course after that I get to live with a gaggle of females in a big warehouse of sorts.
aight, bed time I guess. Night ya'll

The Countdown....

Thursday, June 15th, 2006. I have only 26 days before the Army owns my ass.
I've spent most of this evening sorting thru boxes, throwing away crap, deciding what to get rid of, what stays....
26 days sounds like a lot of time, but all I can think of almost every moment of the day is how I have no time to get anything done. What happened from March til now? Its no surprise I have the worst heartburn I have had in a long time right now. I am so exhausted from work, school, and killing myself at the gym, ontop of trying to figure out how to plan my life so my mom can take care of business while I'm away. And as tired as I am right now, the top thing on my mind at this moment is that its only 8pm, I should go running before bed.